1. Many of the things affecting the guest’s opinion of “service” are out of the control of the server. This crosses all lines in the restaurants; a slow bartender will back up service and negatively affect timing standards for the restaurant. If you’re ever wondering why it’s taking your waiter so long to bring your drinks, try sneaking a peak at the service bar. Often you’ll see them in a state of distress, straw and garnish in hand, waiting for a slow bartender to complete your table’s order. The same goes for the kitchen. There is huge room for human error in every part of the restaurant. The way you’ve communicated you want your food prepared may be EXACTLY how the server communicates it to the kitchen. From there, the chef, expo, or line cook may misinterpret it in some way or become forgetful. If the server isn’t present when the food is dropped at the table, it suddenly becomes their fault. This isn’t always the case, but it goes hand in hand with giving people the benefit of the doubt. If you ordered your salad without tomatoes and it arrives WITH tomatoes and you recall your server acknowledging your request, chances are it was a breakdown in the kitchen. Having the patience to allow your server to correct the problem in a timely fashion or being understanding when they apologize for a drink that took too long …these are great virtues and are ALWAYS appreciated by the waitstaff.

2. Just as your meal is not the only thing going on in your day, your meal is certainly not the only thing on your waiter’s mind. I can’t tell you how many people truly believe they are their waiter’s first and only priority. On a typical night, I have 6 tables at once with that same mindset. A little patience goes a long way. You may have asked for something simple; “may I have some salt, please”. Keep in mind that bringing you salt is one of several things they are juggling. When a waiter is extremely busy and is able to complete all requests quickly, you know you’ve got a great waiter on your hands.

3. It’s true what others are saying. If you tip exceptionally poorly or not at all you are not sending the waiter any message other than, “I’m cheap.” Listen, we’re human beings. We know when we’ve done an excellent job and we know when we could have done better. When I get a mediocre tip on a table I KNEW I could have done better with, I accept it and move on and try to do better by the next table. When I get a horrible tip from ANY table, particularly if I’ve done my job well, it just makes me upset. “Do those people really think this is how much my time is worth?” I agree with the poster that said that a good or average tip when you feel you’ve only had “middle of the road” service is actually greater inspiration for that server to continue to improve. Pay it forward.

Just a few things to keep in mind!

Let us be a blessing.
Great article Bob and great insights. More power!

I have waited tables for over 5 years, and it took me years to realize that when I was busy and feeling overwhelmed, I would sometimes come accross as rude or inconsiderate.

Now that I am older, I make sure to be accomodating. Always apologetic if I make a mistake or overlook an empty drink.

Waiting tables is an art, and it takes years to master.

The best thing anyone can do is be honest with the waiter/waitress and tell them what they’ve done wrong (in a nice way).

If they reject it or continue to be rude/inconsiderate, consult a manager. Serving may just not be their specialty…. everyone needs to do something to get by.

So dont be part ofthe problem, be part of the solution :]

I have no hesitation giving low tips if they’re earned. I also don’t subscribe to the 15% average. 10% is my average. 10% was what my father tipped, so 10% is what I tip, because percentages do not get hit by inflation. When I enter a restaurant, the waiter is sitting on 10% if things go in an average fashion.

He or she can adjust that upward if he or she does things well, or downward if things are done poorly. If you make me feel welcome, your tip rises. If I feel like an unwanted guest, it decreases. The better you do, the better your tip. I’ve been known to tip 35% if the waiter does a fantastic job. I’ve been known to tip nothing if the waiter is horrid.

“our job is to satisfy our customer. Nothing more can be expected, Nothing less can be accepted”

That being said, if you’re having a bad day in terms of making mistakes, an apology should be enough. If you’re having a bad day in terms of being impatient, short, inconsiderate, negligent or rude, you should feel it in the tip.

There is a reason that restaurants are considered to be in the service industry. The food is almost always easy to make and cheaper to eat at home. People think they go out for the food, but really they go for the experience. That means that restaurants sink or sail based on the experiences they create. If a customer has a bad experience, they don’t usually think “crappy server” they think “crappy restaurant,” and they never come back. The restaurant has to ensure that their servers don’t ruin peoples’ experiences because their longevity depends on it. Hence they have you make the bulk of your money in tips.

This is a bit off topic, but since there is a little bit of confusion that needs to be cleared up, I will address this. Yes this is a Christian site, as I am a Christian and the author of the article, but just like yourself, many readers are not Christians. In fact, from my analytics data, I would estimate that well over half of the readers are not Christians.

So, I can’t speak for each of the previous 55 commenters and their responses, but regardless of whether they are Christians or not – you are going to meet nice and mean Christians – becoming a Christian doesn’t instantly turn you into a perfect person, in fact it will never turn anyone into a perfect person – it is just that we are striving to be like Jesus – and oftentimes failing to meet the mark.

To be honest, I have found that many Christians become Christians because they were pretty mean jerks, and realized that as much as they wanted to change, they couldn’t do it on their own. So they cried out to God and asked for help – that was the case with me. I was disgusted with myself and realized that I needed help. I have been doing this Christian thing for almost 20 years and have watched God slowly turn me into a better person, but as much as I want to be a perfect person, I still don’t know if I would qualify to be someone your would want to spend eternity with.

Shortly after I became a Christian (and realized that there are just as many jerk Christians as there are non-christians) someone helped me by reminding me that just because you are following something, doesn’t mean that you have to be like the followers. Politics is a great example. We vote for the leader we want in office, not for the followers of that leader. So in my case, Jesus has forever changed my life and I follow Him, because He is someone that I want to spend eternity with – and I think you would too.